Taking Time for Tea

There is something almost magical about taking tea for me. It almost always transports me back to my childhood, sitting on the lawn of the Royall House, summer air, an occasional stirring of the hot air by a teasing of a breeze, a breeze that brought momentary sighs of relief from ladies in gloves and hats. Green grass, the old gray home standing tall and stately in the background...and yes the slave quarters that made my sister and I whisper about "did the Royall's really have slaves?" We couldn't imagine a worse thing. We were the only children there...all the other guests at these summer teas were true blue blooded proper Bostonians. The society ladies. Tiny pastel petit fours were served on gleaming silver...old silver ware, sterling for sure lay on the sides of our saucers, hitting up against the tea cups. Too many sugar cubes in each of our cups, the ladies let us have as many as we wanted, not like at home where the amount of sugar was monitored carefully. There were cookies, delicate and thin, flavored with orange or lemon. The ladies were pleasant and relaxed, as if they were taking a trip back to their own youth, when people seemed more civil and where your standing in society meant something. They were holding on to something that was already passing away in the 1960's.

Words like proper and decorum were old fashioned even then. I suspect most of those ladies dressed for dinner until they died. There were things "good" people (women) just didn't do... swear, sit in an un-lady like fashion, speak loudly, fraternize with folks below them socially, and marry out of their "kind" and be in the presence of anything shameful, oh yes, they could still blush... does any one blush any more ? At age 10 children are speaking of things I had no idea existed until I was married.

We have progressed, this social standing stuff is for the birds. I grew up with it and hated it.

There were family members who would not attend a niece or nephews wedding simply because they were marrying someone with the wrong last name or that belonged to a different religion.

My grandmother would say in a hushed voice, with her hand up to her mouth as if to shield her words from falling to far, "those are the Other kind ".

But somewhere in getting rid of the things we should have, we dumped some of the good things. I think people should show some restraint in their actions and what is spoken. I think ethics, honor and consideration for another are really good things. Modesty of actions, of spending and of our dress are things I still value.
So this morning when I sat to tea, taking time to just sit and take in some pretty things around me, I reflected on life today. At the hospital, I overheard some talk about how difficult it is to care for some of todays children. They tell the nurses where to go and they scream at the Doctors, they refuse to sit still, and the nurses and Doctors have to take this bad behavior into consideration when setting up a treatment plan. The children's behavior can deter from their treatment. I cannot imagine to tell a nurse to **** ***. At age 52 I have never uttered those words and hope to say that for the rest of my life.

I had no intention of heading off in this direction when I started this post, but the journey of words took this course.

Life dear friends is meant to be enjoyed, enjoyable and held with respect. Once in a while its good to take stock of things, to reflect, to gain vision for your day, for your life.
Taking tea, which to me is more than just pouring some tea out, its about setting some pretty things around you, taking time to enjoy them. This always gives me that moment to breath a bit. To think and to reconnect with what is important to me. And yes, to look back on all the ladies teas I enjoyed as a child.

http://royallhouse.org/