Count it All Joy

Life is strange at times. This morning I woke feeling so filled with joy, so full of the wonder of life and then the phone rang....no bad thing happened, no accident, no illness but rather the kind of call that reminds me of the story of Job. Job 1:9 "Does Job fear God for nothing?" Satan replied. 10 "Have you not put a hedge around him and his household and everything he has? You have blessed the work of his hands, so that his flocks and herds are spread throughout the land. Then Job was tested to the core of his being.

The test of mine this morning was not like Jobs, thank God, but yet, it was in a way. The very peace I wrote about was removed in an instant. Stolen, no wait, I allowed it to be taken by someone for a brief time. The part that went wrong was that I allowed myself to be taken in, pulled into the negativity. Pulled into the quicksand before I even knew what happened. It's extended family stuff. Isn't that always the worst ? As fast as water drops leap about on a hot griddle the subjects changed. It was hard to keep steady and finally I swore. Yes, I swore and hung up. I don't swear, anyone who knows me knows that for me to say a bad word, things have got to be very very bad indeed. I used a phrase for things "not so" or "preposterous". Something you might find in a bulls barn, and then I hung up the phone. It's not the swear that bothers me, it's the loosing of my temper, the allowing myself to be pushed into acting in a way I don't want to act. Maybe it wasn't being pushed so much as being pulled in. Have to think about which it was. More of a pulled in, sucked into the mire.

The point is, it was a hard experience and I feel that I failed to show compassion to someone that really is in need of it. But in this same instant I am thinking bible texts like, 2 Tim 3:

1 But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. 2 People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, 4 treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with them.

I really like the last 5 words of that text and am working hard on making the situation fit as it sure would make me feel better, but.. yes, there is that 3 letter word..B-U-T... I wanted to be more Christ like, more in control of what I say when faced with, (total lack of a word for what it was) along with what I felt, and how I reacted. Stronger in maintaining kindness without compromising my standard. Fortunately, Emery has stepped in and has attempted to take care of the situation one more time. It's a long old story. Probably every family has one to some extent. And there are times when wisdom blended with compassion calls for there to be no more contact, and this is one of those times.

I need to say the verse below over and over to myself today...remembering it for times like today when difficult situations arise. Now, to find my joy in today one more time ! Maybe I will just go back to bed, get up again and redo this morning without the phone call.

James 1: 2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,

3 because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.

All of us face difficulties, hard things, thorns in our sides, people that push all the right buttons to make us forget where we want to be in how we feel and act. We learn from these experiences, and hopefully we become better people from them. The Dalai Lama says "I must emphasize again that merely thinking that compassion and reason and patience are good will not be enough to develop them. We must wait for difficulties to arise and then attempt to practice them. And who creates such opportunities? Not our friends, of course, but our enemies. They are the ones who give us the most trouble, So if we truly wish to learn, we should consider enemies to be our best teacher!"