Living in the Moment

The morning is balmy, a gentle breeze with air not hot and not cool, a bit like a tepid bath without the water. XM radio is playing Magic Bus, a song that brings to mind a time and space of many years ago. Paisley Nehru shirt, jeans with patches proudly sewn on even though there were no holes. Attitude, idealism bound together with enthusiasm for seeking a better way.

I spent time in the garden, picking green beans, cucumbers, parsley, tomatoes...which we seem over-run with. I played with the dog and marveled at her shiny fur coat. Even the goats seem extraordinarily shiny...the kind of shine people spend tons of money on hair care products to achieve. The sunflowers, vibrant against a sky that looks too blue to be real. If the scene was to be painted, you might think of it as garish, but nature is never garish, somehow it works in the natural state of being.

Feverfew in bloom, too pretty not to pick and enjoy inside, so I do and find a pretty little piece of pottery to put it in. It looks natural and a bit old fashioned sitting on the window sill, so I plop my grandmothers baby shoes next to it, it looks right to me. I smile. This is living in the moment.

I was reading this morning about a "crazy" woman sitting on a bus, talking to herself, having a full dialog. The seats on either side of her left empty. We are uncomfortable with such scenes, but the story went on to say that most of us have those same dialogs inside our heads, self talk where we scold ourselves, have conversations of sort where we play it all out the way we want it to be or wish we had done differently. On one level the only difference between the "crazy" lady and us. . .we keep it to ourselves. Our own self talk can be just as incessant, just as abusive to our outlook on life. The story left me thinking about how little down time I give my brain. I am sure I think way too much...seeking more quiet time inside my head. I like the idea of that. Live in the moment more.

Lets you live more deliberately, give more attention to the exact moment that will never come again or be in the future. Lets you decide your actions of the moment with more clarity. I like that too.

I feel like I am really starting to "get it". Right on target for this stage in my development says my wonderful oldest daughter. We laughed at that, when she quoted some book on human development regarding women in their post child rearing time in life. I told her I should enter that into my "baby book". Right on target development wise !

I feel such profound love for my children.