Rose Colored Glasses don't always work right
Sometimes people like to look at life through rose colored glasses and only see the pretty things. I suppose that's o.k. in some respects but its not very wise in other respects. I took off my rose colored glasses way back in 1973, not long after a hippy gave me a pair after I grabbed a ride with him hitch hiking with a friend. They just made the world look a bit off balance. They were cute glasses though, looked like John Lennon's glasses.
On my blog I often speak about the "plain people" and everyone is fascinated with Amish and Mennonites and often they are portrayed as just about perfect people. So much has gone around about how forgiving the Amish have been against the man who went in and shot the Amish girls. It is amazing, it is so different from how many others would react and its admirable on so many levels, but there is a few holes in their system of forgiveness. For instance, it was on national TV not long ago about an Amish girl who ran away from home, to report years of sexual abuse from her brothers. Her mother knew, and said to the daughter, "just lock your bedroom door". Well the brothers, went on the roof and climbed in her bedroom window. The mother knew that and did nothing. " Boys will be boys" was her remark when the daughter told of the nightly rapes.
The girl left the community and with help from the outside, took them all to court, the mother received house arrest, the brothers various punishments. One brother I remember stood in front of the church and asked forgiveness and of course they accepted it, and he married soon after that and had children. Hard to imagine what that home is like, and what risk there is for those children. Forgiveness is great, but maybe not to forget everything and put others at risk.
I knew of a young man who molested two Mennonite children, admitted to it, said he knew they would not press charges so he was home safe. Sure enough, even though people on the outside and even the young mans parents begged the children's parents to press charges so the young mans predatory ways would be stopped, they refused. The young man was not ever punished. No marks against him, a predator on the loose, maybe living near you now.
So there are flaws in such a system of forgiveness and not pressing charges. I am not wanting to say bad things against good people, just wanting people to know their system doesn't always work for the best and maybe I sometimes sound like its nearly a perfect life. It isn't.
One time when we were going to the church, a couple came to visit and had no place to stay. We offered our home, only to be told much later that the man was a sex offender and had molested foster children that had been in their home. No one told us that we were subjecting our own children to such a man. But he had asked for forgiveness, so no one bothered to tell us. My own children put at risk.
I think in life there has to be a balance in such matters. Forgiveness yes, but with some sort of punishment for the crime other than waiting for the persons final judgment day.
I never like painting a picture of things that misrepresent one way or the other. I would rather call a spade a spade.
We need to be forgiving and yes, but there has to be some balance on how we live after that.
There I have said my peace. There are some fantastic elements to life among the plain folk and they certainly have much to be admired, but just do not look at them through rose colored glasses.
On my blog I often speak about the "plain people" and everyone is fascinated with Amish and Mennonites and often they are portrayed as just about perfect people. So much has gone around about how forgiving the Amish have been against the man who went in and shot the Amish girls. It is amazing, it is so different from how many others would react and its admirable on so many levels, but there is a few holes in their system of forgiveness. For instance, it was on national TV not long ago about an Amish girl who ran away from home, to report years of sexual abuse from her brothers. Her mother knew, and said to the daughter, "just lock your bedroom door". Well the brothers, went on the roof and climbed in her bedroom window. The mother knew that and did nothing. " Boys will be boys" was her remark when the daughter told of the nightly rapes.
The girl left the community and with help from the outside, took them all to court, the mother received house arrest, the brothers various punishments. One brother I remember stood in front of the church and asked forgiveness and of course they accepted it, and he married soon after that and had children. Hard to imagine what that home is like, and what risk there is for those children. Forgiveness is great, but maybe not to forget everything and put others at risk.
I knew of a young man who molested two Mennonite children, admitted to it, said he knew they would not press charges so he was home safe. Sure enough, even though people on the outside and even the young mans parents begged the children's parents to press charges so the young mans predatory ways would be stopped, they refused. The young man was not ever punished. No marks against him, a predator on the loose, maybe living near you now.
So there are flaws in such a system of forgiveness and not pressing charges. I am not wanting to say bad things against good people, just wanting people to know their system doesn't always work for the best and maybe I sometimes sound like its nearly a perfect life. It isn't.
One time when we were going to the church, a couple came to visit and had no place to stay. We offered our home, only to be told much later that the man was a sex offender and had molested foster children that had been in their home. No one told us that we were subjecting our own children to such a man. But he had asked for forgiveness, so no one bothered to tell us. My own children put at risk.
I think in life there has to be a balance in such matters. Forgiveness yes, but with some sort of punishment for the crime other than waiting for the persons final judgment day.
I never like painting a picture of things that misrepresent one way or the other. I would rather call a spade a spade.
We need to be forgiving and yes, but there has to be some balance on how we live after that.
There I have said my peace. There are some fantastic elements to life among the plain folk and they certainly have much to be admired, but just do not look at them through rose colored glasses.
Comments
I also sometimes question their seperation in the sense that those outed from the community are then left very vulnerable, as far I know they wouldnt even have social security etc to fall back on, their whole support system is their small comminuty so then if the community outs them they are just incredibly vulnerable. And it happens, for all the focus on forgiveness, some are still shunned.
And its the line there in the shunning that can be shocking sometimes. Ive heared of women being shunned for having a baby out of wedlock, but as you mentioned on the other hand molestors are often forgiven and welcomed still in the fold. And i just cant wrap my mind around all that.
I still admire the Plain a great deal, but these things above do bother me.
We don't go to church any more. Too many personal agendas from the pulpits. I am fine being at home for church