"The Art Of Imperfection"

This time of the year we work hard at appearing perfect. Having the house decorated just right, having baked the best goodies, choosing the perfect gifts and on and on. It makes life stressful.

I wrote this post a ways back, November 06, and I personally needed to read it over again, to remind myself that its really o.k. to not have things just perfect. Perfect is for God and seeking to have things perfect all the time can turn you into a major control freak, and that my friends appears to be one of the most destructive self inflicted stresses in life.

Sit back, let the dust mount, have a less than perfect cup of coffee or tea, and enjoy what can become, "The Art of Imperfection"

A few bloggers out there have recently written about being perceived as perfect and are quick to enlighten us that they are indeed normal and have lives that are filled with things like dust, dirty dishes and bad hair days. We feel the need to set the record straight and that's fine.A while back I wrote a bit about a couple of my favorite books by Veronique Vienne. On that came to mind this morning as I was reading these few blogs on dispelling any illusions of perfection, is the book, "The Art of Imperfection". A perfect book to go along with this subject.It's honestly doubtful that anyone sees another as perfect, but perhaps we idealize the life they speak about on their blog or perhaps its much like what is written on the inside flap of this book by Vienne. It says...."Images of perfection seem to be everywhere - on television, in the movies, in ads, in magazines - not to mention in our own fantasies and notoriously selective memories. Among the places where perfection is conspicuously absent, however, is in everyday reality. The way we look, the people we love, the places where we live, and the jobs we hold always leave something to be desired. "In the book Vienne writes, no she actually speaks to you in her books through her words, she talks about the things that endear us to others, its not anything perfect about us, but our idiosyncrasies. The very things that make us uniquely us.It would not take a nuclear physicist to know there are times when there is only once clean spoon in my house, or that papers seem to be taking over the coffee table at an alarming rate. Not to mention mundane things like laundry piled high. Those are things most of us have no illusions about. Most of us clean the house before company comes or take pictures just when things look perfect, but our friends and family, the folks that love us, know that our imperfections run much deeper than that sort of thing. That is just simply life happening when the house is a mess or our clothes look more comfortable than chic.People who are always appearing perfect are usually control freaks and have a not so happy inner self. Its not the norm to be incapable of letting things slide once in a while.At 52, I can openly embrace my imperfections and accept that dust falls at an alarming rate when the wood stove is doing its job. That's fine, but I am learning to work on the things that are not where I want in who I am, work on changing the imperfections in my life that are not so good. Like being so opinionated, or getting my feathers ruffled over things I see as a moral error on someone's part in regard to my motives. That's the imperfections that call us to change, not the stupid dust or the amount of junk drawers in the kitchen.There are some imperfections we should embrace and accept for what they make us. Maybe not getting something done in a timely manner seems like a imperfection, but if it didn't get done because you were roaming the hillside, soaking in the beauty or chatting with a friend for hours on the phone just because.... many times, those things are the higher road when it comes down to it . Life is far too short to sweat the small stuff. What our goals should be is to make peace with ourselves and who we are. I hate pictures of myself because I am overweight and just don't like the way I look, its an imperfection I can change and am working on it Perhaps someone else has a mole on their face a few chin hairs or bad teeth, that they hate and shy away from the camera because of them, well, those are things that can be changed too. For me, I am eating better, not eating everything I want, just like someone else going to the dentist and having teeth fixed or having a mole removed. Those are things we can change if they bother us. If they don't well, fantastic !But character things, like choosing to be lazy once in a while or gazing at the sunrise rather than making your bed, well those are just part of what makes us tick and changing them would change the person we are. I honestly feel my life is just about perfect. Sounds a bit Mary Poppin like, but its how I feel. I get to do the things I want. At my age, I have finally come into my own and am not living to other folks expectations. I have my down times, my times of confusion and doubt but they are brain stretching so now I am comfortable with them. Things happen in life that are difficult or painful but that's just simply life. Its how we deal with them that matters. What they make us, or what we allow them to make us.My children are not perfect, but pretty close to it. My husband is 99% perfect and that is the truth. Sometimes I wish we had a bigger house, a fancy car or money to buy just what I wanted, but those are momentary things, and soon I remember things are just really as they need to be in my life to keep me who I am, keep me authentic and real. So yeah, my life is perfect for me, or pretty close to it, but that's where it ends. Its not the life for anyone else. Not exactly the same at any rate.So, this stuff about dispelling any ideas that our lives or we are perfect, its just not really necessary. The folks that love us, well they know it already and the folks that don't know us, well, maybe they are just looking for a hero, but the real hero for everyone is who they are deep inside and letting that show.Now of course I am writing about the human side of stuff and I am not talking about God as our example in this post simply because if He is for you, then you know it already. That's kind of unspoken stuff you know for yourself.