What it's all about

Yesterday I woke up thinking about what life is all about, I wasn't in a down mood, but more contemplative. Filled with hope. Yes, its a serious question for sure, one that needs to be looked at from time to time.
I spent a bit of time looking back through my life. Looking at what has motivated me to live the way we have at certain times in our lives. Honestly I can say that my personal motivation has always been to live a better life, its just I didn't always "get it". Understand what the message was all about. Many times I couldn't see the forest for the trees. I take the "order" to live a godly life very serious, its just the instructions given by some shepherds, can be pretty far off the mark. And we tend to look for the easiest way, and the one that lets us avoid looking deeply into our own hearts.
I remember saying to someone once, "if you really love God, you don't have to worry so much about all the rules and regulations, because having that love will automatically put things in order." I still believe that, but my oh my, its just so much easier to concentrate on rules than it is to work on loving others and not judging ! I spent a lot of my life spiritually looking down my nose at others, all the while quoting verses on judging others when I personally felt judged.
It was so much easier to be concerned with all the aspects of modesty, and dressing plain than to live with the mind of Christ towards others. It was so much easier to talk about keeping a certain day holy, than to feel true compassion. You see, its just easier to concentrate and focus on the externals than to do the heart work. Talking about wearing skirts only is so much easier than going out and helping the unlovable. Measuring my own Christianity according to the externals is a lot more comforting than to measure it according to what Christ has asked us to do. Love others as much as we love ourselves ! That means I want the best for anyone and everyone. I don't. I would rather sit here and tell you the not so positive aspects of my in-laws rather than want them true happiness and grant them compassion and love from my heart.
I am far more comfortable measuring my own life to the scale of "we do that, we do this, oh my we cannot imagine going to the movies" rather than look deep in my heart and see how I lack the one thing we are meant to have, love without an agenda that is self centered.
Maybe my motives were in the right direction but they missed the whole entire point. Wearing a head covering, dressing in black stockings and black shoes, never letting my elbows show might have been done for the right reasons but they can become the main point when it should be just what it is, clothing choice. The main point should be to live without judgment. Judgment is the single most self centered selfish act of all times. It makes us feel better. That is all judgment is about. "We would never do that" We are suddenly higher than another in our minds and hearts, taking a seat reserved for an honored guest, only it really isn't for us.
There are very few that point out a fault of another with a pure heart in place when they do it. Most that are pure in heart, would ask God to do the work.
So here I sit, finally getting what its all about. Its about having the love of Christ in my heart. Its about seeking to live compassionately, to live with the same mind of Christ. Not easy to do. It goes against our nature. If we put first things first, love others as much as we love ourselves, well, first we need to learn to love ourselves I guess, but if we live with that sort of love in our hearts, I suspect the rest of it, all falls into place. Its just so much easier to look at the outside rather than face our deepest shortcomings.