Making it More Simple

Its never easy to swim against the tide, its hard work actually. We live in a society that values things, when what most of us want is friendship and family. We behave contrary to what we actually want. Its not stuff, that satisfies our souls.

I read today a rather sad fact, "New research compared studies from 1985 and 2004. On average, each person in 2004 reported 2.08 close friends-those they can discuss important matters with. That's down from 2.94 people in 1985. People who said they had no one with whom to discuss such matters more than doubled, to nearly 25 percent."
"This change indicates something that's not good for our society," Smith-Lovin said. "Ties with a close network of people create a safety net. These ties also lead to civic engagement and local political action." The results are based on responses from more than 1,400 American adults to the General Social Survey, conducted by the National Opinion Research Center at the University of Chicago since 1972.

We have often replaced friendship with stuff . Wouldn't it be nice to sit out on the porch with neighbors rather than feel the need to shop, spend money we don't have, and fill the house up to overflowing ? So many of us live with closets full of clothes, yarn, fabric, crafts we will never do, collections that take over cabinet after cabinet, only to be a burden at some point.

We have to work harder than we like so we can buy bigger houses with more rooms to house our "stuff". It can begin to feel like a hamster wheel.

We as a family have made an effort to live simply, but simple living can mean you are tempted to have different kinds of "stuff". You still have to watch yourself from getting caught up in a world of getting things to match your lifestyle. I know plenty of folk that buy lots of stuff that is old fashioned so they look like they are living the simple life. Three kinds of butter churns, 4 washboards, 7 cast iron pans, 12 rolling pins, that sort of thing.

Even the blogging world has taken up this mad dash to "exchange" stuff with each other. I feel bad for the next generation having to clean out their parents houses when they die. You can hear them now, "mom had a collection of 732 tea towels and 569 doilies, I wish I knew her better". My great grandmother had a couple quilts she made, treasures for their rarity. If she had 200 on hand, they may not have seemed so special. We might have thought, "wow, she didn't do much besides quilt" I am not saying these things are wrong, collecting etc, but not on such massive scales or with the gusto of a small child collecting tiny broken bits of shell on the first trip to the ocean. There is nothing simple about excess. I know some people will feel like I am stepping on toes here, but what I am doing is stepping on my own toes. Preaching to myself. I have been guilty of it all.

Take time to have coffee or tea with a friend, or a child, small or grown rather than search ebay for hours for that one more tea cup. I am scolding myself here big time.

Simple living is more about knowing what you honestly need, having a few wants to make your life a bit pleasant, but weighing the cost of having a want and making sure it is worth it.

Its about working for comfort, but having time to enjoy it.

Simple living is about living with quality of life that goes beyond what we can acquire at the store. Simple living is about not being burdened with more than we need. Its about looking honestly at what things matter in the big scheme of things.

Are we collecting to fill a void left from broken relationships that we could mend ? Are we filling voids by shopping till we drop, rather than be comfortable in being alone with ourselves ?

Off to do some serious weeding through "stuff". I want a home that reflects this thought "we tend to become like that which we love". I don't want to become like "things".

I don't have the answers to it all, but I do know that seeking to live less in the rat race of life makes people happier in the long run. Today in my posts the research has shown that the material rat race is not making us happy people.

Real happiness comes from time spent with loved ones. Emery and the children climbing trees