"Well Done My Good And Faithful Servant"

"Well done my good and faithful servant" is a verse from the Bible that many folks love and many folk strive to accomplish something in their lives so they too will hear those same words. Praise is a good thing. And this verse is an example of that. In the Amish and Mennonite world praise is just not done. Children are not told they look nice, or did a great job. Babies are not told they are cute or pretty, all because the fear of becoming prideful is so strong. But, there is an imbalance that develops when you never hear that you have done something well. There is a huge difference between being prideful and simply feeling good about yourself. Sure, fella's like Absalom with his love of his hair are a bit much, and he certainly paid a price for his over the top pride, but Proverbs 31 is summed up in the final line, " and let her works bring her praise at the city gate." Praise is a good thing.
I suspect we might all do a bit better if we felt confident about ourselves, real confidence, not the kind that comes in the form of boasting, that is usually a cover up for not feeling good about yourself. Boasting is usually an act of trying to convince. The people who yell the loudest, "look at me, look at me" often are just hoping you don't see what they really feel inside.

Feeling good about yourself is often hard work for few of us have had perfect families that helped develop a good self esteem. Don't be afraid of that phrase, "self esteem". The phrase has taken a beating in some circles, confusing it with boasting and over the top pride. Consider if you are a parent, are your children confident, self assured ? I have heard it said that it takes saying 100 positive things to cover one negative thing said to a person. What have you done the most of with your children, your loved ones, the positive or the negative ? What about your own self talk ? Uplifting or drag you down sort of talk ?
There is a great web page on self esteem by the University of Texas in Austin, Melissa's Alma Mata. It's geared to students but its good for anyone to read. Talks about how to improve how you feel about yourself. Take a look at it. Its worth the visit. Better Self Esteem


Emery and Melissa @ 1983

Comments

Holly C. said…
Ahhhh-She loves her daddy so much! What a sweet photo.
Joyce said…
This post comes Providentially at a very good time. I am dealing with several people with low self-esteem, and this gives me some insights into their thoughts.

As a Christian, I think "taking every thought captive" is a way of dealing with negative self-talk. The Bible, once again, was out ahead of modern psychology. God knows what we need to hear so well.
The Stricklands said…
As a parent, it is so important to see your children as God sees them - precious, valuable, loveable, irreplaceable. That comes with the responsibility to instill in your children compassion, caring, obedience, and so much more. Balancing all of those can make a mom a little crazy some days, but it is so worth it in the end.
Diane said…
What a beautiful picture.
em said…
I think there are many ways to show how much you appreciate your children. My Amish friend has often told me, in the presence of her kids, how grateful she is for all the help she gets from her daughters. It is true that she never tells them that they are good looking or have a pretty dress but they all know that they do a good job around the house that are invaluable. All seven children are happy and confident. They know that they are loved and appreciated. The first time I stayed with them I was surprised how much love they showed, the kids went from one lap to another and there were plenty of hugging. This is just one family and I don't know how representative they are.
And I have to add that they always tell me when they think my clothes are pretty!
Margaretha
Patty said…
Hi Em, not many Amish children feel good about themselves. The Mennonite community we came out of has more young people with struggles that are kept repressed and in doing so, they struggle with some serious issues and this community is not an exception. Its just not something plain people acknowlege, matter of fact, self esteem is a phrase that is considered a totally worldly thought. A visit tells you one thing, living the life lets you in on a different side of things.
em said…
Patty,

Aren’t there two kinds of self-esteem? Maybe even more. Knowing that you're good at what you're doing and being able to face what life offers you is one thing. Knowing that you never will be perfect in a Christian sense is something totally different.

I strongly dislike the word proud and Naomi (my Amish friend) and I had a good laugh when she discovered that, as she had never heard a non-Amish avoiding that word. That discovery started an interesting discussion about being worldly and what it meant to us. But as I said in my other post; I only know one family and am hardly in the position to say what is a norm and not.

I love to visit my friends — but it is not a life for me.
Have a grand day!
Margaretha
Patty said…
Hi em,
Not so sure we are on the same page regarding what I said in my post.
Dana and Daisy said…
I love that picture of Emery and Melissa. My dad has a hard time telling his kids in front of us that he is proud of our accomplishments. But I know he tells people when we are not around. I think he'd get all choked up if he had to tell us straight to our face! lol!
em said…
Not being on the same page is the best way to learn new things - about others, yourself and life!
Margaretha

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