Looking Back to a Time when...


Last week when I was helping Melanie and Casi pack to move into their new house, I made the comment to them that when you have small children, you need to be well organized in order to maintain a tidy home. I then reminded Melanie of my system when the children were growing up. We had boxes labeled in our storage with numbers on the boxes and on the kitchen counter was a small index file box with a card for each box, same number on the card as the box, and then the contents of the box was listed on the card. It was so easy to find things that way. Just look through the cards to see which box had what I needed and then have Emery get the box off the shelf in the garage or the loft of the barn.

In the house, we kept the children's toys limited to a few at a time, kept on a shelf in their room. They always had lots of books, all neatly organized on the book shelves. Tubs of Legos and Playmobile toys were kept on the shelves too.

Each day had an assigned cleaning task. I had daily chores, biweekly, weekly, monthly, seasonal and yearly chores and these too were kept in a file on the counter of my kitchen. I thank Emilie Barnes for this system. I went to a seminar of hers way back in the early 1980's in California and it made my life so much easier. So I was reminding Melanie about how we did things, being motherly about it and suggesting she think about a system like that, after all it works.

The children had chore charts hanging in the hallway for years. Stars given daily for chores done with a cheery heart. Attitudes were on the chart too. That made me aware of any of my own complaining too. Had to set a good example ! As I was telling Melanie all this, Casi looked a bit puzzled. Finally he said something like, "I am kind of surprised you were so organized". I had such a laugh, it dawned on me that those were the old days and now, things get done when I get around to it, which since my house is not messy, it must be enough but there certainly is NO schedule for things and there are no longer any boxes that are numbered and a file to match on the counter. I have lost my way. I have gone astray !

Life really changes when there are no longer children at home. I am so much more flexible and not nearly as fussy about how things look. There are two piles of papers in my computer room on the floor and they are not even bothering me. That would have never happened in the "children at Home days".

I clean as I go through the day. No schedule though. Tuesday is no longer ironing day, its just Tuesday, and things come up so ironing may be any day, today for instance will be ironing day, provided nothing comes up, but there is this darling quilt top waiting to be done for the room that will be containing Mei-Lings crib and changing table at Grandma's house. The room is going to be red and white, with lots of redwork bedding. Since that Pram I got for her is red, well, the room has to match, don't ya think ?

I was at Goodwill yesterday morning, and there on the shelf was a nice new, un-used, spine not ever cracked, copy of Emilie Barnes book "Simply Organized". I really felt a twinge in my conscience when I saw it, considering my conversation with Melanie and Casi. Was God telling me something ? Did HE make that book appear on the shelf just for me ? I had to wonder. Actually its probably guilt that made me feel those thoughts about this innocent book. I bought the book and sure enough, it was the exact plan I had used so long ago. My original copy was in a 3 ring binder and is still on the shelf, but well worn. I looked through the book last night and mused that Monday would be a good day to give this system a try once again. I think. Being organized at this point in life might just be a bit over rated. I did it for years, maybe its time to move forward and maintain this concept of being flexible and ready for adventure instead of being so tied to a daily cleaning list. Hard to know. I may give it a try, monday.

I do know that keeping house with children at home is a whole different ballgame from this stage in life. Being organized was a must for us. Homeschooling until noon each day, having all those animal chores, sewing ALL our clothes, including slips and pajama's. Butchering chickens, maintaining a huge garden, milking goats twice a day. All the church functions too. It was a lot of work. All the canning too. The house had to be prepared for guests at any time, sometimes up to 20 for a meal, if two families were travelling together. We maintained a "tight ship" and it worked.
But that was then, and this is now.

I could not begin to do all the things we did when the children were home helping, now. I had such helpers, such willing hands to do chores, clean woodwork, do dishes, weed the garden, make the beds, even bake desserts !

At this point in my life, flexibility counts. I need to be able to lay down whatever I am working on to help Melanie at this point in life, or pick up this for that person, do this errand for that one.

One of the family mentioned recently, they don't know what they would do if I was working outside the home, because I am the one to "do" what is needed.

Life has times and cycles and right now, my mothering chores are different than so long ago, but I do think maybe, yes, I hate to admit it, it might bite into my unstructured day, but it might be good, perhaps, maybe, we will see, if I just read that little book through and headed back towards a bit more structure in my cleaning and organizational skills. Oh that was hard to say !

Well, I will wait until Monday, sorta like dieting isn't it. Mondays are always when you start.
photo: the question, to iron, dust or quilt ?

Comments

Leah Spencer said…
That's not hard... quilt! I've missed seeing them. I really loved the one you did with spiral circles and gave to Melissa. :)
Anonymous said…
I'm a huge Emilie Barnes fan. She literally saved my sanity back in the early 90s when I was a SAHM that didn't know what I was doing and felt very overwhelmed and underqualified. So I understand the joy of finding one of her books at Goodwill!
Patty said…
Emilie Barnes was a life saver for me when the children were growing up and time was needing to be managed, plus she has such great ideas on gift baskets and holiday celebrations
Patty said…
You know Leah, that quilt is my favorite too. Melanie wants me to make her one too. Melissa loves to snuggle up in that quilt on those cold Vermont days
Gina said…
I think I need to look through that book. I'm not organizing a home with children (they are 17 and 19), but we could all use a good reminder of how to make small motions result in an easier time for all. Thanks.

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